Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm really into asian looking animals
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
