yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
