Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
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