im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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