my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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