You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
