shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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