I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
