This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
