If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize