I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
