11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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