You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
