Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize