I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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