My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
