i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
