I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
