I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
