Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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