So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
