are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize