i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Randomize