one two three fourrrrnication!
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Green mimosas i think yes
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize