ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
