3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Four minutes until I can fart!
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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