at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
