if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
