I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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