i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
