Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
