sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
