who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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