I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize