Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
