Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
