I just made out with a guy for $7.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
