did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
