I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
