It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Mom said you looked used
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
