id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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