Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
