dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
