I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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