Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize