Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I can't trust your balls anymore.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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