Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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