we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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