Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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