i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
