chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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