your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
